Why Can't They Just be Happy for Us?

Ok, I know my sister occasionally reads my blog, and my mom has been there once. I warned both of them that my knowing they may read would not hold me back from writing about them if I had something I needed to get out. I told my sister, "I'm giving you the address, but if you piss me off, I will blog about it." My sister is not who I'm refering to here. If you're a relative and continue reading, it's at your own risk because I have to get this out.

I'm tired of all the well-meaning advice from a couple people in my family, and my family are generally more supportive of the foster adopt situation than L's. I mean no disrespect to them and I know their advice is out of concern, but I know what I'm getting into. I'm tired of hearing the following:

"Are you sure you're ready to take another one, what about Smiley?"

"Do you know if she's gonna be healthy? What if she has problems? Are you sure a relative won't take her away?"

"You really need to focus on Smiley. He has a lot of catching up to do."

As you can see, this is questions of genuine concern, but they are hurtful too. It hurts me to hear that they would even imagine me neglecting Smiley to care for Princess. I don' t know the answers to all the health questions and the doctors won't know this young either. It's called having a prayer answered and taking a leap of faith and trusting in God.

Suppose I gave birth to Smiley, then popped up pregnant again a couple months later. None of you would tell a friend who got pregnant quickly after her first child any of this advice. Think for a minute about whether you'd ask these questions to a pregnant friend....OF COURSE NOT!! That would almost be like suggesting they have an abortion or give the baby up for adoption so they can focus on their firstborn child. Insane isn't it.

Since I am adopting, why am I being asked these questions. I know it's because I can choose to leave Princess in the hospital with nobody. I don' t look at it as a choice, though it is, and I choose to take the baby. Who am I to pray and pray for a mostly healthy newborn baby girl, then turn her down because my kids will be close in age? Why can' t I just get a "congrats" like they pregnant woman.

Oh, to show you that I do know my limits with children. We were left a message to call a caseworker about 2 girls they needed a home for. We had to say no, of course, mainly because there simply wouldn't be enough days in the month to get everyone to court dates, visits and doctor appointments. I know after taking Princess, it will be all we can handle for a while until they grow up. I don' t have the space for 4 anyway. After Princess, we can a slot for either one boy or one girl, due to room sharing rules.