Lilypie 2nd Birthday Ticker

You Could Always Adopt. . .

Adopted 3 boys out of foster care, then got pregnant for my beautiful daughter, now currently pregnant again with twins.

Friday, August 04, 2006

Parental Advice

According to bio mom, a french fry is good for a teething infant to chew on and you should slap an infant for chewing on your shoulder for teething relief.

Now I'm not against spanking in some circumstances, but you cannot hit a foster child. He was only chewing on her shoulder because he was hurting. Besides, it's cruel to hit an infant! First of all, they can't grasp what they are doing wrong yet and probably just think mommy is trying to hurt them. Spanking doesn't work until they are 2-3 and know they are doing wrong. I was spanked, and I'm glad my parents did. Of course, it didn' t last long once my parents found out I'd rather get my ass whipped than not be able to play with my toys. Then my mom started punishing me in 15 minute increments! 15 minutes with no toys..the torture!

I am having a problem with baby N and he needs some "direction." EVERY time I feed him, he pulls his feeding tube out several times. Since feeding takes 2 hands, it doesn't leave me an extra hand to pull his hand out the way and SPLAT...formula everywhere.

I tried pulling his hand away with a stern "no." I doubt he understands that either because I repeated the process 10 times in one feeding, and just had to try to grab his hand before he could pull the tube out.

How do you teach a 9 month old not to do something? I don' t want to have a new tube put in just so I can get one with a locking peg. Toys don't work, because apparantly the feeding tube is the most interesting thing.

Any suggestions? Does he understand my pulling his hand away and telling him no or am I wasting my time?


  • At 7:04 AM, Blogger Michelle said…

    Wow--don't you just love the advice bioparents give??? I remember Sarahs biodad tried to convince me that giving her a RAW steak to chew on would alleviate her teething symptoms....sigh.....Babies his age I don't think really have a concept of "No"...I think by just being repetitious he will start to understand....Maybe if you drape a blanket over top of the tube while feeding he won't be able to "find" it?? I dont know I will think of something for that one!!! Oh and I have the nipples for you!!!! I have a good assortment of cleft nipples w/ attached bottles and some orthopedic type nipples...So I will mail them out either today or on Monday!!!!!! ttyl

    my chosen child

  • At 7:06 AM, Blogger Michelle said…

    oops meant to say orthodontic not
    my chosen child

  • At 7:49 AM, Blogger Tamara said…

    I've been trying to do something similar with Cookie and diaper changing - she always wants to flip over or grab the dirty diaper - eeeeewwww. I tried the "No" thing, but it makes her cry, and I don't want this small thing to become a begative experience - like feeding, you want it to be positive. I tried toys, but found something she cannot resist - cell phones or a remote. So, she gets a dead cell phone or a dead remote control, and she is happy as a clam. I think you may have to hunt until you hit on something more fascinating than the tube...a cookie or teething biscuit? Cookie LOVES those Biter Biscuits (even though they are gross messy once they get to suckin on em).

    BTW - Sooooo excited to read about N's progress. That little butterball is gonna be up and walkin and talkin in no time!

  • At 8:24 AM, Blogger soralis said…

    A french fry ... ya and so good for him too. *note the sarcasm*

    Don't you just love it when they start to get their own personalities and realize that they can control their environment, yet they don't understand you just yet! I am in that stage right now with my twins and the only thing that works seems to be distraction... I have no experience with a feeding tube, that sounds very challenging. Good luck and I hope you find something that will take his mind off the tube.

    Take care

  • At 9:41 AM, Blogger DrSpouse said…

    If the NO! is loud enough and scary enough it might mean he associates playing with the feeding tube with something mildly scary. But only at the point when he's actually grabbing it...

    I vote for distraction - perhaps there is something else he'd prefer to play with.

  • At 9:59 AM, Blogger sourpatchbaby said…

    I vote for distraction too. Or maybe you have an unused tube that he can play with while you feed him? The Kid seems to think that when you say no, you are playing. baby N is probably laughing and thinking is all part of a big game. You could see if he can have a small piece of ice. I have tried that with The Kid and it seems to keep him busy for awhile. Since baby N has some problems I'm not sure if he could be allowed to have ice. If he is, then that will not only help alleviate the teething pain but also distract him.

  • At 8:45 PM, Blogger Awesome Mom said…

    Feed him in a high chair with the tray on. Then you can feed him under the tray and the tray would block his hands better. What kind of tube does he have? My son had a mic-key and it is nice because they have an extension that will tightly fit in the tube so it will not come out when you are feeding.

  • At 9:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said…

    Hmmmm... I have an idea, which might work. Is the feeding tube in his belly? (I have only seen one baby with a feeding tube, and that is where it was located.) I think you could probably use my "diaper changing trick" -- maybe.

    My 1st (and to a lesser extent his siblings) was a SERIOUS butt-grabber during diaper changes. During poopy changes this is gross, gross, gross, esp. when the butt-grab is followed by a head-grab. Nasty. But how to use both hands wiping an ass, and prevent two baby hands from grabbing ass?

    I will attempt to describe my solution:

    I started changing him on the floor with his head to my right and his feet to my left. I would keep my left foot tucked under myself (like half sitting cross-legged) and drape my right leg across his chest. I didn't put hardly any weight on him -- my heel was on the opposite side, and the bulk of my thigh kept his hands off his rear.


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