I LOVE Bottle Feeding!!

I am absolutely adoring Bubbles, especially our feeding time. I love how she stares at me with those big blue eyes while she eats. Sometimes she stops drinking to smile or laugh at me. I melt. Of course, I'm a little irritated when she does it at the 3-4am feeding, but it does help me know it was worth me getting out of bed.

Bubbles is also a happy baby. I REALLY hope I do not jinx things writing what I'm about to write. She wakes up, she's happy. She comes home, she's happy. She gets in her swing, she's happy. You pick her up, she's so damn excited she squeals in laughter.

Bonding has definately happened. As I was writing last week about not feeling as head over hills as with Smiley and Princess, I imagined it wouldn't be long before that feeling changed. It wasn't. I'm hooked and she has me wrapped around her little finger.

It's been a week yesterday and my heart already breaks at the thought of her leaving. I know I'm supposed to be a good foster mom and be happy if she goes back to her family, but mom was given the choice to live in a group home and not have her baby taken.

I still don't know what will happen, but her loss will hit me hard. All these great things about her just makes me have a gut feeling I will lose her. I know she's not mine, but like I tell L, I am "mommy" to these babies until the judge says otherwise. She's a happy, healthy baby. They never sent us a healthy baby, so I wonder if that means we won't get to keep her.

Bubbles is an easy baby to care for. After Smiley and Princess, I feel like she is almost no work at all(I am sure jinxing myself to an up all nighter with Bubbles now). I love Smiley to death, but his neediness has made caring for a healthy baby so much more exciting and a blessing. I guess I never realized how much work Smiley was until now. It's so easy. I just give her a bottle, she drinks it, and she grows!

I'm still having feeding issues with Smiley. I tried putting an avacado in the food processor. It came out looking like chopped onions, so he didn't go for that. He wouldn't touch the refried beans either, although I could probably put them in his feeding tube.

His doctor is sending him to a stomach doctor to have him examined before we get into allergy testing. I tried getting his ENT to do allergy testing, but they don't test children under 5. They referred me to an allergist, but they don't take medicaid. I asked for prices to self pay(and expense it) but the nurse wasn't even sure if the doctor would allergy test him if the only symptom he had was vomiting. What does it matter? I'm gonna pay him! I want him tested!

Oh well, I covered my ass bringing it up to his pediatrician. Next time they bitch about him dropping weight, they better not blame me!