Couldn't Do it Again

At first they gave baby girl to another family even though they said we could have her. L stepped on a couple toes and the worker called us(she did say she'd place with us first anyway) and said she was bringing her to us. When worker went to hospital to check her out, he health problems were a LOT more severe than just testing positve for cocaine. "Mom" had also been on meth and TONS of smoking during pregnancy. She had severe heart and lung problems already, not expected to live long and being transferred(probably) soon to Children's. The other family(single mom) still wants her, so please send her love and prayers because I know it's going to be a rough journey for her.

Although I cherish every moment I had with Princess, and I would take HER all over again, knowing what I know now, I just cannot knowingly take another baby that I will likely have to bury. Plus, I now have 2 little ones and would not be able to make to 4 hour round trip to visit her as often with both.

I guess I need to stay out of the way next time and let God do what is best.

P.S. I am SO SORRY it took so long to update. I have been having other "issues" this week, but I'll save it for another post. It's been a long week. There's still Smiley's sibling possibility in July, or possibly Bubbles 2nd baby sibling coming soon. Both moms would ask the babies be placed with us if taken.